Tuesday, March 29, 2005


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If any of you (or your hounds) are members of Dogster, feel free to add my pups as pals: Oliver Basset
Kurt von Nugget

.:3 comments | baked by pie at 5.43 PM | permalink:.



Monday, March 14, 2005

Dharma

Death borders upon our birth, and our cradle stands in the grave. Our birth is nothing but our death begun.
- Bishop Hall

Farewell, little Dharma. You will be missed.

.:5 comments | baked by pie at 12.58 AM | permalink:.



Thursday, March 10, 2005

Random stuff

** To that guy in the car in front of me at a stoplight yesterday morning alternately waving moronically and making the "ok" sign with his fingers... Uh. Stop that.

** I have four days off work until my new job starts on Monday. I plan to see if it's possible to grow moss on oneself during that time. I'll keep you posted.

** Anyone want to go to the zoo with me on Saturday? Rob's being a big poophead.

** I firmly believe that anyone who appears on a daytime talk show such as Jerry Springer or Maury should be forced to sign a waiver that states that they will be sterilised directly after said appearance. Of course, that'd ruin the shows' chances for second generation guests, but in my opinion, that's not much of a loss. And humanity is an endless pool of stupidity from which they can draw new guests.

** The job I'm starting on Monday is the first programming job I've ever heard of where the coders have to dress "business casual". I'm thinking of going on strike.

** It bears repeating: I love four-day weekends. Now I'm off to have my 7th cup of coffee since I woke up at noon, and do crosswords while blaring some Ministry from my stereo in a futile attempt to drown out our Redneck Neighbour's country crap.

.:4 comments | baked by pie at 3.57 PM | permalink:.



Sunday, March 06, 2005

Become a Minion. See the World.

I've decided to take the first decisive step towards the Cult of Pie. I've added a link on the left: Sign up for the Cult of Pie. Please take the time to fill out the form. The benefits will far outweigh the drawbacks. Really. What? I'm not laughing.

I'm still working my arse off on this project, so that's all you're getting from me at the moment. Except this amusing link: God FAQ. Oh, how I wish I'd thought of that first!

.:5 comments | baked by pie at 4.05 PM | permalink:.



Saturday, March 05, 2005

... and a wheelbarrow full of orangutans

I've decided that I will henceforth no longer be an atheist. I've decided to believe in god, and that god will be me. Yup. Supreme Ruler of the Universe. I didn't create the universe (so don't blame me), I'm just going to rule it now. My powers are apparently still ramping up because I don't seem to have as much control as I'd like just yet. But it's coming. Damn it. It's coming.

The main problem seems to be how to get my name out there so other people can worship me. Do I make bumper stickers? Send out billions of spam emails? Take out an ad on late-night TV? Well, I suppose the first thing is to get myself a nametag so I can at least inform those that I see on a daily basis. But that only covers a very small minority of people in general. I need to get my name out there on a larger scale. The largest scale, in fact - worldwide. Maybe I should try a many-pronged attack including infomercials, skywriting and a reality show featuring my antics 24 scintillating hours a day.

I've also come to the conclusion that if there is a hell, when I die I'm going to be greeted by a bunch of guys in red pajamas who would like nothing more than to spend eternity jabbing me with pointy sticks.

.:3 comments | baked by pie at 1.47 AM | permalink:.



Wednesday, March 02, 2005

I must apologise for slacking here lately. I've been killing myself in the name of more cash, doing a project for my new job as well as working my current job (until the 9th, anyway). It's left me little time to plan for my cult (or complain about stuff here). The builders are loitering around and still haven't finished up the bunker, damn them. Unfortunately, none of my current minions are in the construction business, so I guess I'll just have to wait it out. Remember to send your check now if you want a top bunk. They're going fast.

I came across this little gem in my site logs today: "sock fetish". I know there are some strange people out there, with some strange likes and dislikes, but this was a new one to me. Foot fetish, sure. Shoe fetish even, why not? Socks? Not so much. Unless you're one of my hounds.

Wait a minute... I knew I'd smelled dog food on my keyboard yesterday.

.:7 comments | baked by pie at 3.20 PM | permalink:.